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Tuesday, May 5, 2015

A Gift Guide for the Southern Mother

Gift Guide: A Southern Mother's Day



Rodan & Fields Reverse Skin Care Set, $179.00
Help Mom refurbish that skin you stuck her with after carrying you for nine months and putting up with you for those 18+ years.

Ralph Lauren Romance Perfume, $70.00
The man friend got me this for Christmas. I prefer Viva La Juicy, but it was a sweet thought so I keep it on the counter, and my Mom loves it. It's a good "mom" scent.

Tyler Candle Company High Maintenance, $22.95
For Mom to light after your brother takes his shoes off.

Vera Bradley Large Duffel, $85.00
Because for some reason every Southern teenage/college girl and Mom love a brightly colored quilted anything. Hello pot, meet kettle (I own 2). Add a monogram and she'll feel extra special.

Monogrammed Acrylic Key chain, $18.99
Because for some reason that I cannot figure out, Southern women feel the need to monogram everything.  Their cars, tshirts, shoes, and any other surface they can find.

Jack Rogers Nantucket Sandal, $118.00
These are a great Summer staple for any Southern Mom over 50. Oh, and Grandmother. Can't leave her out. They weigh about 212 pounds each, are like walking on bricks, and Southern women get a new color every year. Oh, I almost forgot to mention that these can also be monogrammed.

Ugg Suede Slippers, $120.00
Because we can't have her walking around in Mu Mu slippers. Unfortunately, I don't think these can be monogrammed. But if there is a way, a Southern woman will find it.

Countertop Wine Cooler, $130.00
Self explanatory. 

Brazilian Butt Lift, $55.00
This should help with the "bleacher butt"(also known as a flat ass) she developed over all of the years she was forced to sit in the stands and watch you play every school sport offered, no matter how bad you sucked at it. 

Travel Mug, $19.95
Because there is no better way to hide a little day drinking on-the-go than with a travel mug that says "Shhh, there's wine in here". In fact, buy 2 so you'll have one for yourself. After all, you're the reason she's a mom, therefor, you are the reason for the day drinking.

Lilly IPad Sleeve, $14.97
As previously stated, Southern women love brightly colored printed things. And access to social media at all times. 2 birds, 1 stone.

Bliss Bubble Bath, $18.00
So Mom can soak in the tub with her glass of wine after a long day in her  212 pound sandals, while pretending to listen to your sobs about how that bitch Mary Margaret stole your boyfriend John Luke David IV.

Coffee Mug, $18.99
Mom will need this for many reasons. Hangover jump start, to brag that you think she's "the bomb", and to remind herself that she did all that hard work and all she got was this stupid coffee mug.


xo,

Jaime 




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